To: Ms. Belle M.
From: Feona Seize, Regional Director,
the National Coprology Society.
Madame,
We of the Coprology Society make it our
life's work to lift the study of fecal matters out of the toilet as
it were. We believe that bodily functions can be discussed by
reasonable adults without becoming scatological. We are concerned
that your columns are setting back our hard-pressed efforts because
they are flush with juvenile crapological references and bowdlerized
humor. Our society has strained and pressed for a better air around
discussions of the bowel issue, but if you persist in depositing your
brand of filth on the internet, you will make us look like crap.
Please take the higher road and not the
easier chute in the future. The next generation deserve not to be
dumped on in this way.
Also, please log this complaint in
your permenant suppository.
Yours emphatically,
Fe Seize, Regional Director,
the National Coprology Society.
Dear Fe Seize,
Pucker up. Or put a plug in it. Do you really think, you one-holer, fecal-minded, sheet lover, that you can tell me what to do? Someone treated you to two swirlies too many, and the Tidy Bowl penetrated your brain - such as it was. By the way, you're now on one of my lists; guess which one? |  |
Shooting clay pigeons and drinking Old Crow at 140+ years, born in backwoods Buckshot County, KY, raising hell & great-grand-chilluns before we were born. With a small column in a paper in Lake Sprang, WY, she came to notoriety when her mail was sent to the White House by mistake. The administration could not answer these hapless people’s questions, so they sent them back to her. Flirty, intelligent, annoyingly candid; read her once and you won’t get her out of your mind. Here's Belle!
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Steaming Coprology
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