Penny For Your Thoughts

Dear Auntie Belle, 

My left shoe is a comfortable, all leather loafer, but my right shoe is a real pain in the ass. The right one keeps talking to me. It says “you’ll have to foot the bill, you’ll have to foot the bill.” I can’t get it to close its flap. 

This is giving my socks insomnia and they can hardly stand up anymore. 

Do you recommend extra starch, psychological help for one or all of us; or tan my shoe’s hide within an inch of its life. 

Penny for Your Thoughts 

Dear Penny, 

Listen to your right shoe! I have never had a right shoe lie to me, but those left shoes are utterly devoid of principles. Oh, and keep me afoot...er, apprised at what happens next.

Auntie Belle